Opposites Attract & Wanting It All

November 30, 2012

KathleenScootybyGreer Lately I’ve been feeling pulled, from the inside out, in opposite directions. For example:

– I want to buy a little cabin in the middle of the woods and spend my weekends soaking up the sun in the middle of nowhere
+ But I also want to build a super modern eco dream house in the middle of the city where I can ditch my car and walk/bike everywhere 

– I want to slow down and chill out
+ I want to change the world. Right now. 

– I want a baby
+ Oh wait … No I don’t.  

– I want to develop another ECourse, take on 4 more clients, write an EBook, and brainstorm a workshop / retreat – all so I can help other creatives live what they love
+ I want to do some yoga, learn to surf, become a gypsy and travel the world … 

– I want a clear head and 8+ hours of sleep a night
+ But I also want a glass of wine and late conversations 

– I want to be a non-consumerist
+ But I also want to support local and handmade with my dollars
+ And if I’m being honest, I really want those cozy boots 

– I want to read and teach
+ I want to do and create

– I want to be inspired by the details
+ I want to imagine the big picture

This sounds pretty painful, right? And to be honest, at times it has been. It’s all too easy to play the role of the victim – suffering from circumstance and the way things are. If only I had chosen a different path. If only I had gone to a different University. If only, if only, if only… Then I give myself a stern talking to about being an ungrateful, spoiled brat – which always ends in tears. That’s not the person I want to be.

I’m ditching the victim and the brat. I drive this ship. The common thread is that I want. I want. I want. I’m okay with that. The challenge is in having it all.

Challenge accepted.

Photo of me, a dog person, and Mister Scooty Boots by Greer Inez

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